From November 16-22, Bullying Awareness Week will encourage bystanders and victims to “Stand Up! (to bullying).” Program Head, Family & Community Social Services (FCSS), Prof. Paul Sherman, and Acting Program Head, Early Childhood (EC), Dr. Nikki Martyn, reveal that the key to stopping bullying may lie in empowering bullies as well.
Bullying is an important topic at the UofGH. Our FCSS and EC students are likely to encounter situations of bullying at some point in their career – whether in their placement or on the job. For Prof. Sherman, it’s important to educate students on bullying to enable them to intervene and, hopefully, advocate. Dr. Martyn explains that EC students must learn to recognize and address behaviours that could lead to bullying from “a soft, nurturing place.”
Defining bullying
Before we can have a meaningful discussion about bullying, we must first define it. “[Bullying] has become such a social phenomenon, such a negative thing, it becomes easy or even convenient to say ‘Well, I was bullied,’” explains Prof. Sherman. Defining bullying ensures that we measure the frequency of actual bullying rather than the feeling of being bullied.
Prof. Sherman defines “true bullying” as having four elements:
- Deliberate intention to harm another person
- Repetitive behaviour
- A power imbalance between the victim and bully
- At least one person (usually the victim) is not a willing participant
Understanding bullies
Contrary to the usual tough-guy image of bullies, Prof. Sherman and Dr. Martyn reveal bullies may need healing and nurturing themselves. A low self-concept and a lack of confidence are common characteristics of bullies. Bullies also tend to lack empathy and an appreciation for the interconnectedness of life.
Dr. Martyn cautions against labeling young children displaying aggression such as biting and hitting as bullies. Often confused by their behaviour and feelings, young children usually lack the intentional element of true bullying.
Lastly, bullies can also be victims. Martyn describes that being bullied can lead to someone constantly feeling they must “defend themselves from an imagined [other]” by “hurting the other before they hurt them.”
Helping bullies and victims
Prof. Sherman and Dr. Martyn agree that the key to tackling bullying in favour of helping both bully and victim involves prevention, education, and remediation.
Prevention and Education
Parents and schools share the responsibility of preventing children from becoming bullies. Prof. Sherman explains that if we teach kids more lessons in morality, “then there’s less of a chance that these students will then turn on other people in a victimizing or a bullying kind of way.” These lessons include teaching kids to embrace others, respect life, and appreciate how human and environmental life are interconnected. He explains, “If you feel empathy towards people who have difficulties, if you’re able to put yourself in their shoes and understand them, you’re less likely to pick on them.”
“Aggression and anger are part of human nature,” states Dr. Martyn. Parents must teach children how to manage those feelings by creating a safe environment for children to share and by teaching and modeling empathy.
As bullies share a low sense of self, helping children and youth to increase their confidence and self-worth could also prevent them from becoming bullies.
Remediation
If prevention fails, then there must be clear consequences for bullying. Many schools have policies and clear communications around bullying, yet more needs to be done to help bystanders and victims feel safe and encouraged to report bullying. Prof. Sherman admits campaigns like Bullying Awareness Week help raise awareness of bullying, but he stresses that education must accompany that awareness.
Likewise, remediation alone is not enough. Dr. Martyn emphasizes that effective discipline requires clearly connecting the consequence to the action.
From bullies to heroes
In many ways, putting a stop to bullying can be a healing process for both victim and bully. Dr. Martyn is hopeful that we may yet turn bullies to “passionate protectors” by empowering them to “change their story” and by helping them “see themselves as somebody who can protect others – like a superhero.”
Bullying Awareness Week at UofGH
On November 19th from 2-3pm in GH319, Prof. Sherman will give a short lecture on bullying and show a film about a 13-year-old boy who is bullied. Hosted by the FCSS Society and Prof. Sherman, the event is open to the entire UofGH community.
Bullying Awareness Week began in Canada in 2003. This annual campaign aims to raise awareness about bullying and incite appropriate action to stop bullying.